Eeeengleeeesse

If you personally know me, you’d probably know that I am highly frustrated and disgusted at most Malaysians’ English proficiency. Dey speek like dis wan wor. Halo, I is a girls. I is not knows what you say. To those who feel offended just because you know what I’ve just said is nothing but the truth, well, sucks to be you. Those who actually take the initiative to learn and correct themselves, keep up the good work but those who still can’t form a SIMPLE sentence without a grammatical idiotacy and think that English are only for ‘ang moh’ (Westerner) wannabes are just sad people.*Ehem*

I could rant on and on about Manglish (Mangled English, also known as Malaysian English) but that’s not the purpose of this post. I’ll be talking on how people who don’t speak English, surprisingly, benefit me in a rather comical way. This is my account.

I was playing Shadow Hearts : Covenant in the living room when I heard a knock on the door. How irritating, right? Reluctantly, I went to open it (thinking that it’s probably a salesman anyway). And I was right – it was a salesman/someone promoting some stuff I don’t even know what. Anyway he started speaking Mandarin to me, and I replied him, “Sorry but can you please speak in English?” Then he said, “Umm……dunno wor. Ni chen de bu huay jiang aa?” (Translation : You really don’t know how to speak?) I shook my head, saying “Sorry, I don’t understand what you’re saying” (Of course, this was all just a lie >P Of course I understand Mandarin. SIMPLE Mandarin =_=) Then he started speaking Malay to me O_O He said, “Kamu orang Cina ka?” (Translation : Are you a Chinese?) [There. Another thing I don't get. Don't just assume I can speak Mandarin/Chinese dialects just because I'm a Chinese sheesh -_-] Exasperated, I replied, “Sorry I only speak English. What do you want?” Then he started saying (in Malay) that they’re trying to promote some stuff (I really don’t know what, I wasn’t paying attention =_=), and I was getting kinda fed up, so I said as politely as I could, “Sorry I’m not able to help you.” and started to close the door. I think he said something like “It’s okay then” or something along those lines rofl. There. Managed to shake him off without appearing rude in under 5 minutes >D

So to those of you Malaysians out there who can speak English decently, USE MY METHOD IF YOU DON’T WANT TO WASTE YOUR TIME WITH PESKY SALESPEOPLE! Better still, if you speak a foreign language, GREET/REPLY THEM IN SAID FOREIGN LANGUAGE! Guaranteed success! >D

Tags: English, how to avoid salesmen, Manglish